I know, I know it's been a while. I also know it's been a while since I have confessed how hard it is being a single parent! Disregard my last post about being able to wait a few more years to remarry. I need back up... NOW! Or at least someone who will protect me from the "grenades" thrown at me daily from my teenagers. I feel like our home has been a battlefield lately and all of us are losing the battle, and leaning to the dark side. Last night when I was "throwing a fit" during my prayer to Heavenly Father, I felt so hopeless and so weary...so, so WEARY!!!!! HE must have given me extra armor through the night because when I woke up this morning I felt soooooooooooo much better. I have been very thankful in my heart all day because I feel HIS strengthening power, once again.
I have 5 boys and 3 of them are teenagers...need I say more about how difficult this is. I have been AMAZED at the level of difficulty. No wonder people say...Grandchildren are God's gift for not killing your own children. I get it! Now rest assured...my children are not bad. They are good sons of God; however, testosterone has suddenly taken my 3 teenagers hostage and they are trying to learn how to understand all of that...puberty, hormones, boundaries, independence, etc. I could go on and on, but I don't want this post to be all doom and gloom.
I, as the parent, am learning how weak I really am without the Lord's help. I do things wrong daily, but I am doing the best I know HOW...with the circumstances I have been given. I certainly would have shrunk from this responsibility several years ago without HIS sustaining power. I just don't like when I am "left to myself", but maybe I need those times, to acknowledge more fully how much of the load HE really is carrying.
So there you have it, a confession long overdue from this single parent!
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