Renewal

Well I made it through another semester at UVU. I missed about 4 weeks of class (near the end of the semester) because I started homeschooling my 3 youngest, and I still got decent grades. I got an A in my Drugs, Behavior, and Society class and a B+ in my upper division Principles of Community Health class. Not too shabby if I do say so myself.

 Today I attended UVU convocation exercises because a friend of mine was graduating. I started tearing up thinking if my day would ever come. I felt so proud for the graduates and all their hard work and the pride they must have felt at that moment. Now that I'm homeschooling, college is on the back burner. I felt a tinge of regret for taking a leave of absence from college. Then as the graduates were coming through the veiled entrance to the stage one by one, I visualized myself coming through the real veil that separates us from heaven, and I imagined friends, family, and loved ones cheering me on as my name was called to step forward. What an honor that would be to know I had graduated from earth life with honors. That I had got my Phd in motherhood and was ready for the eternal work of motherhood that lie ahead. Yes, education is important, but motherhood is the essence of heaven! The regret left and I was proud that I chose to put my children first.

I share this not to make anyone feel guilty for getting their education and having a career. I realize we all have different avenues we have to follow and we know what's best for our families, and so does the Lord. I share it because it gave me a sense of RENEWAL in my calling as a mother. Maybe it can shed some perspective for those who think that life as a stay at home mom is passing them by. All mothers are engaged in the greatest, most challenging work. President David O. McKay said, " She who rears successfully a family of ... beautiful sons and daughters...deserves the highest honor that man can give, and the choicest blessings of God". What a tribute!  Happy weekend!


                                               My short hair 3-1/2 inches off!

Flexibility, Freedom, Fun

Flexibility, Freedom, Fun -
These are the words I use to describe Homeschooling. Yes, I know what you are all thinking because it's the same thing I used to think about homeschoolers. Now that I'm on the other end I understand WHY some mother's homeschool. I would have never even considered this was an option for me, and my three youngest if I hadn't have prayed and received this answer. The two older, of the three youngest, were having constant issues at school. One was just plain miserable being in his class that he didn't care about anything. This reflected in his apathy towards schoolwork and inappropriate behavior at school. The other just has attention issues that aren't conducive to a classroom setting. Since I had no intentions of medicating this child just so he'd be compliant in a classroom setting the Lord showed me another way... Homeschool. I am proud to report that both are much happier being at home. They are thriving big time and it's wonderful to be apart of that. It's enjoyable teaching them and seeing their thirst for knowledge. I love that we can be flexible and take all the time we want on any given assignment. I love that we can go on  field trips once a week. We get to spend quality time together. I don't get the tired, stressed out attitudes and behaviors walking through the door anymore after being at public school all day. We have no homework. We live in the best neighborhood ever and once our homeschool is over they bolt outside and play for hours with their friends. I don't know how long we will be on this homeschool journey, but for now it's an answer to many heartfelt prayers.

                                         Field Trip to the Hogle Zoo w/cousins and friends

                                         The peacock was strutting her/his stuff.

                                                             This orangutan was huge!
                                        

                                         I decided to move art to the backyard. We are learning
                                        about Pablo Picasso. They are painting their own version
                                        of  Picasso's "The Girl Before a Mirror".

                                                             Cheesy smile!

                                          Josh is becoming quite the artist! He doesn't like
                                          homeschool too much yet. I think he misses the
                                          fanfare he got at school because of his charming
                                          personality and just plain cuteness.

                                         He spent a lot of time on his painting and it turned
                                         out good. He has a blanket in his lap...only at
                                         homeschool could you get away with that. :-)

                                         The mom! See how long my hair is getting - well
                                         on Monday I'm chopping 3 inches off.
                                         Goodbye long hair. 

Traditions

When dear ones pass from our lives we create traditions to honor our memory of them. Last month to honor my mom's birthday we visited her gravesite leaving beautiful flowers to adorn her headstone. We also launched 10 helium ballons and watched them float away as we laid our backs upon the grass. The day after her birthday my sisters and I and two of my mom's wonderful friends went out to lunch together. My mom loved to eat out at restaurants with friends and family so it was a good way to honor that memory. Here are a few pictures of that lovely luncheon with dear family and friends.

                                                                       Mimi's Cafe

                                           A picture of my mom and her two best friends

Gail and I posing for the camera

                                                   Anna brought her daughter Abi
                                            

                                           Nicole with Anna and Abi in the background
                              

                                         Linda with her spunky hairdo and beautiful smile

Lessons Learned

Happy February! I normally would not share a journal entry with you, but feel inclined to because sometimes when we share our struggles it helps others. Some of you may relate with what I share,
so we will all be in good company. I wanted to title my blog "Fleeing Ninevah" but decided not to because my children are not intentionally evil and wicked like the people of Ninevah were. So I titled it "Lessons Learned" because I did learn some lessons today.

Journal entry :
Today has been extremely difficult. My children have been especially difficult with their stubborness, moods, and temperments. Stake Conference was a burden because I had unruly children to deal with. My heart was heavy with anger and frustration. I couldn't wait to get out of Stake Conference. Once home I still felt discouraged and was on the verge of tears. It was the first time ever as a single parent that I wanted to flee. I needed to get away. I thought about where I could go. I didn't really have many options. I thought of going to Temple Square, then I thought of going to Nicole's Mid-Singles Adult ward since I hadn't gotten anything out of Stake Conference. So I walked in the kitchen and told my Dad I needed to get away for a few hours. He let me take his car. As I drove there my heart was heavy, I was trying to fight back the tears. I felt like Jonah a little because I was "running away" from this calling the Lord had entrusted me with, that of being a single parent. The only difference was that I was running to the Lord for help and relief instead of running away. I knew I would find comfort in attending sacrament meeting and I surely did. As I sat through the meeting listening to the faith-filled testimonies I could feel the heaviness become lighter. I felt like every word I heard was oil filling my spiritual lamp. One thing that really stood out to me from a few of the testimonies being shared was the fact that we have no right to counsel the Lord. We have no right to counsel him to give us what we want in life because we think it's our right to have it. We should, however, counsel WITH the Lord in all our doings, and he will direct us towards good. It might not be what we want, but what he knows will be good for us. Elder Holland posed a question, regarding the Savior and us, that I've had to remind myself of lately : "HOW COULD WE BELIEVE IT WOULD BE EASY FOR US WHEN IT WAS NEVER, EVER EASY FOR HIM?" (Think about that one for a while when you are murmuring like Laman and Lemuel). The experiences of today have softened my heart, and I have found myself expressing sincere gratitude for the 99.9% of the time that my Savior carries me. I guess today was a humble reminder of how often he really is helping me. I certainly can not pick up this "cross" of single parenthood again without His divine help. I truly am nothing without him. Thank you Lord for directing me towards good.

So there you have it, lessons learned from a now more peaceful daughter of God. I hope your Sabbath has been full of lessons learned and love shared! Until next time...